Wednesday, July 13, 2011

I get a little bit stronger…

I just wanted to say thank you for all of the positive support and encouragement from yesterday’s blog.  For the first time in a long time I have people in my life that I can depend on and it truly is an amazing feeling.  So y’all get a huge pat on the back.

I had slept really well two nights ago with the help of a friend and was even able to get out of the apartment and on my way to work before 8am.

Today I will not get home from work until 10:30pm and it is putting a huge storm cloud over my head.  I need to snap out of it if I hope to accomplish anything today.

I brought my husband with me last night to a kickball scrimmage.  I am a very competitive person with a bit of a temper that usually doesn’t go so well for all involved when I am playing sports.  He made it a point to compliment me after we left on how much I had calmed down in that regards.  I explained to him that I did lose my temper once but felt absolutely HORRIBLE for it as soon as I did it.  He told me that he was proud of the change that I had made.  It felt great to have someone else recognize all of the hard work that I am putting into myself.  And it even made me realize that I have in fact made some changes.

I am definitely still sad but it just dawned on me that I find myself filling up my calendar now because there are people that I want to spend time with more than the need to just not be by myself.  I love my friends.  I know that for a lot of you that doesn’t seem like some huge revelation but it truly is for me.

When I organized my previous Meetup group I didn’t do a very good job cultivating relationships.  I focused on managing the group.  I have learned that I can do both.  I can constantly put together new events and make sure that new people are creating friendships and take this group of… 15? people that I love and continue to grow relationships…  It’s one of my super powers.  Aside from the steel hands that I apparently have…

If you have no idea what I am talking about, let’s just say I was told I rode the mechanical bull for over 3 minutes today.  Alright.  Fine.  I will go get in the shower and get on with this day.  Hope you all make it a great one.  Lots of love.

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